Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve spent time reflecting on the year just passed, and thinking on where I want to be at the end of 2020.
I wasn’t in a great headspace 12 months ago and I didn’t go through this exercise then, so I can’t review goals set. That being said, there really weren’t any – I was surviving.
Since I started writing down goals mid-year in order to track and celebrate the achieving of, on reflection, I’ve realised that I have actually done a lot in 2019. And so, onwards and upwards we go!
For 2020 I have decided that my theme will be: freedom and responsibility. The two should not be separated.
I have come up with some intangible goals. These goals are more mindset or lifestyle goals. Designed to improve myself as a person:
I want to consciously make a difference (well, continue to consciously make a difference) in my workplace, in my social networks.
I will consciously make an effort to positively impact everyone I come into contact with.
I have also set some tangible goals:
I have set a goal to read 100 books this year. I have set a goal to get good at making Vietnamese Pho.
I have set a goal to start to learn Mandarin properly (more than just dabble). I have set a goal to travel (this one is seriously overdue). I have set a goal to enable my teenagers to spend more quality time with their cousins.
I want to drink less, stay up later, be more social, cook for people.
I want to use my gym membership more than the four times I used it in 2019.
And perhaps THIS is the year I learn to snowboard…!
Where do I want to be in late December 2020?
Physically in the same apartment (hopefully). It will be nice to not have to move house for a while.
I have savings goals I’ve written down to achieve, so I’ll continue to be careful with spending.
Love? Who knows.
Health? On track.
Finances? On track.
Today I’m happy. I’m content. I plan to continue to be so in 2020.
Sometimes in that pre-dawn time, especially after a somewhat restless sleep, I have the weirdest dreams.
Today’s effort was quite odd.
I was in a village – narrow, cobbled streets with laneways. The sunlight was playing on the brick walls of the tall houses and building and it looked amazing. However, I was too tired to appreciate it and was simply wanting to get home to rest.
I knew the way I should walk but for some reason I kept getting turned around. Road signs kept changing. The position of the sun kept changing. The elevation of the paths kept changing. People kept blocking my route so I had to continually find other roads to travel down.
I went down an alley and a person moved a cart in front of me so I couldn’t pass. They asked for my help re-potting some plants (WTF?). Even though I needed to be on my way, I stopped to help. I always do.
When I went to wash my hands, the soap I used wasn’t soap. It was a glue of some description and I just could not get it off my hands. Everything was sticking and slowing me down.
The frustration was just huge and enveloping and increasing. Like a persistent fog that clouds everything.
And just as it all nearly got too much, I woke.
The dream was so clear and I have such good recall of it. What the heck was that all about?
Last night I had a dream. And it’s not the first time that this one has entered my consciousness – and the fact that I was able to recall it in fullness afterwards means I probably have to pay attention to it, yes?
I’m interested in my mind and things like dreams, and I believe everything interconnects in a way not yet fully understood.
I’m also interested in the interpretation of dreams.
I’ll write mine here. Feel free to comment!
In my dream I am riding a pushbike in an Industrial area. It’s dusk. No people are around. Suddenly I get a puncture in a tyre. (note: the first time I had this dream it was in one tyre, last night it was in both).
My ‘fix-the-tyre’ guy is a long way away, so I pick up the bike, put it over my shoulder and start to walk.
I follow a track. There are fences and stiles to get across. People come up behind me and push past as I’m not following the track at their pace. Some look at me with pity on their faces. Others laugh. All leave me. Carrying my bike.
Next, several classrooms of children are on the track. They’re walking towards me and all pass me by. My kids are there. They walk and talk with me for a while but then have to catch up with their teacher.
I eventually get to my tyre guy, who fixes the punctures…