In the past few months I have had the privilege to attend the funerals of two grand ladies who I never met.
A privilege as I got to ‘meet’ them through the memories, the recollections, of those closest to them. Their children. Their grand-children.
Learning about them. Their lives. Their trials and their joys.
And more importantly, the esteem that was attributed.
Being an observer to grief is an interesting experience. Being there to support without knowing what was required was an honour.
Meeting extended family that I’d otherwise never meet was a challenge.
Finding common ground was cathartic.
These funerals have brought my present into stark relief. Whilst I worry about my day-to-day existence, I feel I need to pay a little more attention to the future. To the ‘what-if’s’?
At 44, one generally doesn’t think about mortality. More to the point, I know I still think I’m kind of a kid, one who is immortal.
What legacy am I leaving?
What will my friends say about me in the event of my demise? (I’m actually curious about this – feel free to comment!).
What will my family say about me?
How have I improved or added to the lives of those around me? Those closest to me?
Has my presence made a difference to them? Or am I so self-absorbed that I take from people more than I give? I hope not.
I really hope not.